Your phone makes a sound, and you feel your breath restricted. It’s not quite a jump, but your nervous system has again been activated. It could be your mum, friend, or a social media notification, but it doesn’t matter; you’re anxious every time your phone makes a sound. Your heart rate increases as you slowly pick up the phone and see yet another message from your ex. As always, the message destabilises you. There is a feeling of low-level panic as you read the messa

Recent findings in a Home Office independent review (2025) of family court cases have revealed an alarming reality: domestic abuse, particularly coercive and controlling behaviour, is still being minimised or dismissed within child arrangement proceedings. Despite 87% of closed cases and 73% of open cases involving domestic abuse, only 42% were treated as relevant when deciding where a child should live or spend time. Psychological and emotional abuse — the most frequently re

Many protective parents enter the family court with the belief that justice will be served.  You provide strong evidence of emotional abuse, and for some, physical.  You have police or social work reports that support your concerns about your ex’s ability to provide emotional safety.  But because you love your child, because you want them to know their parent, you present to the court a contact arrangement that, in light of the concerns, still creates a window for the ex to h

One of the most painful experiences as a protective parent is when your natural instinct to protect your child from your ex is labelled parental alienation. You do everything in your power to deflect this accusation by bending and flexing with your ex to demonstrate the opposite, but you remain desperate to protect your child. You diplomatically highlight to your ex unfavourable behaviours, hoping they’ll understand and adjust. At least for the sake of your child’s well-bei